Monthly Archives: December 2006

Getting… OLD,
or out of shape;
both really.

Spent about 6 hours yesterday painting bedrooms in the new house. The ceilings are the killers. Now that my ceiling is done, I’m glad, but had I known how much my back would hurt afterwards, I might have skipped it. I don’t know.

Anyway, I can hardly move, and today we still get to put on a second coat! Yippee! :*(
Fortunately, I made sure the ceiling wouldn’t NEED a second coat and so it should be simple enough just to paint walls.

Our master bedroom is now a gorgeous chocolate brown on the walls and ceiling, but one wall will be a dark burgundy. It’s really not an enourmously different color as far as I can tell now, but it’s not on the wall yet. Also I’m going to paint the trim in the burgundy. Last night after it got dark and I was finishing up by lamp light I could see I was getting exactly the effect I wanted. I think it will look very romantic with our wrought-iron (look) canopy bed with it’s creamy colored drapings on the corners. (I might have to invest in a new comforter cover to match it. Right now the colors we have aren’t so much compatible.) Overall it’s really warm and cozy and inviting. Not bright and airy. I’m all for bright and airy, but not in the room I want to sleep in. Besides, we have a sliding glass door in our room to the back deck. If I want light all I have to do is open the blinds and there will be plenty.


What a letdown…. Claudia was a very nice Hispanic woman, but I don’t speak a lick of Spanish beyond the basics. I actually took Italian in college! Then, we tried to do a hair style like one i found in a book there, but i forgot that the hair on my neckline was no way in hell going to lay flat on my neck and do a little flippy at the bottom, the hair on my neckline grows upwards basically…. i have cowlicks all over the place. So my bob looks fine, but the part that was supposed to be a little longer and flippy at the back just looks like it was missed in the cut. It sounds weird but the picture was super cute and I would have been happy for it to look like that. Alas, that is not gonna happen. I’m going back on Saturday for some highlights and I’ll have her trim it up to match the bob all around. Kind of an inverted bob. I think I’m going back anyway… i’m kind of torn. It wasn’t at all the type of place I usually go to, on the other hand, the prices were a lot more reasonable. As soon as she asked me if I wanted my hair washed I knew all was not right in my world. Of COURSE I want my hair washed, that’s part of getting a hair cut lady. The rave reviews on citysearch clearly were in reference to a previous incarnation OR their expectations were very low. I shall have to put my own out there. She was nice, she didn’t do a bad job, but she didn’t do a great job either. Thus, I’m a little scared about having her put highlights in my hair. We’ll see.

I will try to get a picture to post later.

In other news I’m literally falling asleep at my desk. I’m seeing double. This can’t be good.

Well, i took the plunge and have a hair appt at 5:30 today with Claudia. (Pronounced Cloudya) She has the same accent as my college roommate Claudia from Torino did, so I shall ask her if she’s from Torino and maybe score big points. Of course, what if Torino is like some rival city? >.<

Imagine scenario like this:
Claudia: “This stupid American lady thinks I’m from Torino? Che putta! I will show her what I think of Torino!!”
Me: “Crap!! I just wanted 2 inches taken off, why am I bald?”

Preferred scenario:
Claudio: “Ah bella mia! Si, si, Torino! I will give you the best haircut ever!”
Me: “Ale’! Grazie mille! Molto lieto!”
and she will transform me! (well, one can wish).

My favorite Xanga sites are full of interesting and witty commentary, thoughtful reflection, eager hypothesizing about the future, and have an all-around high intelligence quotient….

This is not going to be one of those sites today.

The question before me: What to do with my hair? It’s currently below my shoulders, dark brown, and very fine textured. The texture leads it to look stringy a lot, because there is just NO body to it. I also get a lot of fly-aways and broken strands. I was growing it out mostly for the convenience of being able to put it in a ponytail, which is my way of saying “i just don’t care” i think. Anyhow, my husband has suddenly gotten rather insistent that I cut mine. That’s what I get for watching TLC’s “What Not To Wear” program with him. (I love that show btw, love it! Except for the fact that I increasingly resemble the people on the show at the beginning of the show and not how they are at the end.) The makeovers are so incredible and clearly he thinks I’m due for one.

I’m all for the idea of looking nice for my husband, but I’m rather inherently lazy. This means I usually don’t like to style my hair, wear makeup, or dress in confining clothing.  In the morning I can usually be found racing out the front door about 20 minutes after waking up, or less if I don’t have time to shower. (Mondays for instance.) In the evenings I can usually be found in my pajamas or sweats immediately upon arriving home. I used to do all those things but then he told me he liked me better without makeup, that he didn’t care what I did with my hair, and that I should dress comfortably. Hah, so you see, it’s actually his fault. Inherently lazy also means that I’m on the heavy side because exercising is something I pretty much hate to do, and ice cream is actually part of the food groups triangle, i think at the top…. kind of like a sundae with a cherry on the top (though I hate maraschino cherries, but they look cheerful, don’t they?).

Next problem, my hairdresser that I’ve been going to for years and years now is getting extremely difficult to get in to see without taking time off work. Taking time off work to get my hair cut is not really tenable because… well just because. I feel wrong about it. Besides, she works about a half-hour drive from my office, and my hair cut usually takes between half-hour and an hour of time. So, that’s two hours just to get a hair cut! Not workable for me generally. So, now I am thinking it’s time to find a new hairstylist. But, and I think most women will agree, having to find a new hairstylist borders on the pain of going swimsuit shopping… What if they SUCK?! And when you call a new salon and don’t have a specific name to ask for, they put you on the list for whoever is newest, and thus may totally screw up my hair. Thinnish fine hair shows every cut and a bad one is really obvious. The main reason I have an ‘i just don’t care’ attitude is that I’m actually quite vain, so if I give in to it, I pay far too much money to get my hair cut and colored just so, and it has to be an upscale salon. I’m a closet snob. That means I could have a very expensive, sucky hair cut while I’m looking for a new stylist. That prospect is not pleasant, because I probably won’t be able to throw it up into a ponytail at that point.

Third problem, finding a picture of a haircut that I like, that will work for my hair type, and that will complement my face shape and not make it look rounder. (More round?) Bangs? A bob? Short above my ears hair? A chin-length bob or a shoulder length bob? I need a picture because if I just describe what I want to a new hairstylist, the odds of coming out looking halfway decent drop dramatically. Apparently you have to use just the right words to describe things and I’m not “in the know” on the jargon. It would really help if I’d taken any pictures of hair cuts I’ve really liked in the past, but of course that would be too smart. Usually by the time I have a picture, the cut is grown out and not representative of what I want.

So, as you can see, I’m stuck at the deciding points of several decisions that should be inconsequential, but feel annoyingly important.

In other news, my realtor just called and I am now officially a homeowner!!! Wahoo! Too bad I can’t get in the house for four more days…  On the other hand, the act of not charging the seller any rent for the four days she will be in the house prior to our taking possession (my personal decision to show her grace) resulted in her giving us her china hutch that was in the house, because, we had been “so gracious to her”. So, chalk one up for grace and it’s effect on people! When we looked at the house and made an offer on it, I asked my realtor “find out if she’s interested in selling any of her furniture! I love it!” So, I’m pretty stoked about that. I would have been perfectly happy to move in to it fully furnished as far as the main rooms of the house were concerned.

I’m really excited about getting in there and doing some stuff like painting the bedrooms. I’m planning to go with some pretty dark colors in our room… chestnut brown, dark red, merlot, that kind of thing. Saturated colors. Warm, cozy, inviting colors. Soft lamp lighting instead of bright overhead lighting. Hurray for being able to change whatever you want as long as you can afford to do it!!

C’mon Saturday night!!! Get here faster!

I have now officially signed my life away in order to buy a house. I feel like a grown up.

Question: why didn’t I feel quite grown up at 40 without buying a house? I owned a house at 22… definitely didn’t feel like a grown up then.

Then again, I bought that house under false pretenses, pressed by my (unbeknownst to me) con-artist, live-in boyfriend. To be clear, I did know he lived with me, I just didn’t know he was a con-artist until afterwards. Anyway, he talked me into buying this house with his income but on my credit, using a loan where all they do is check your credit rating, they don’t verify your employment. Why anyone would give out this type of loan is far beyond me. Why I would allow myself to be persuaded to do such a thing is a completely different sociological, psychological treatise. Suffice to say I thought I was doing the right thing at the time.

Anyway, that’s all somewhat beside the point of why I feel more grown up today than I did yesterday before signing all the papers for this house. You’d think by 40 years of age one would feel grown up without the outward trappings of “adulthood”. And, mostly I did. I am married, I have stepchildren that I raise and stand in the gap for as a mom, I own a car outright, I have a steady income, and pay my bills on time. Those are “adult” things. Still, I feel that little difference.

In other news: Lots of Christmas parties and other Christmas events coming up. Feeling as I do about my appearance right now, I’m not looking forward to them as much as I might be, because I have nothing special to wear to any of them.  I have pretty jewelry though. I’ll make do somehow. If only I could lose 50 pounds overnight. *sigh*

I’m in love with this JM album! No, really! I am!

A recap of my weekend, including Monday since I stayed home:

Friday night I got sick, from food poisoning it would seem, though I can’t think of a single thing in my diet on Friday that would have had that effect. Has anyone ever gotten food poisoning from a peanut butter and jelly sandwich?  I know it wasn’t the night’s pizza for dinner because I had already started some sickness symptoms prior to eating it. Getting to experience my pizza twice (once on the way down, once on the way up) was less than thrilling. Perhaps my Grande Soy Tazo Chai™ from Starbucks that morning that I didn’t really finish until sometime in the afternoon, after it had sat on my desk much of the day? I would put more emphasis on that thought if it wasn’t for the fact that I have done that innumerable times before and never had that problem.  Whatever it was, it was not fun. My body seemed to think there was still stuff to get rid of LONG after I had gotten rid of everything humanly possible.  In that state, it’s the little details that can make a big difference…. such as, noting that cleaning the toilet within the last couple of days was most serendipitous.  We have friends in Rwanda right now that are on a mission trip, and they mostly all caught some sort of virus that involved multiple trips to a toilet that was rather less clean. Ahh the joys of piped running water and flush toilets and soft beds. My prayers went out to them, once i got my self-involved head out of my own misery for a little bit. I admit my prayers for myself were rather more like… Oh God! NO MORE! I can’t take it!!  Please God! Ohhhh here we go again…. owwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. I got very little sleep.

Saturday morning I was afraid to eat, but I was incredibly full of energy considering my lack of sleep and my exhaustion from being sick. I played World of Warcraft for a few hours, took Miss Plum to work, then got to work on the blackberry bushes in the back yard. This may have been a big mistake. Overexertion and heat-exhaustion kicked in and I almost passed out, since I was operating on little sleep, little food, and little water.  After laying down and cooling off for an hour or so, I joined Yohan in the garage to sort through the “amazing pile” of boxes of STUFF we have so we don’t have to move what we don’t want. I was strong and got rid of some things I’ve been holding on to for no reason except denial. Holding on to my skis meant I was still a skier, right? Holding on to my tennis racquet meant I might still learn to play tennis some day! Holding on to boxes of notes from my childhood meant I was still young, right? I actually got rid of my old journals even. I have realized that every time we move I end up rereading them and get depressed over the things that happened then. Do I really need to remind myself what a shit my boyfriend was when I was 17?? Really?? You know what? I don’t need that anymore. buh-bye!

Saturday night we took Miss Blueberry and picked up Miss Plum from work, then went out to eat at Zao – a noodle place. It was soooo good! Then we went to see Happy Feet. What a great movie! It was hysterical. A definite keeper. That’s going on my wishlist at Amazon as soon as it shows up to pre-order. I may even have to see it in the theater again! I’m not much of a theater movie person because all of the little noises that people make bug the shit outta me. Crackle of candy boxes, popcorn, slurping soda, people whispering, kids kicking my seat. That stuff drives me bonkers.

Sunday we went to church. Pastor James was speaking, and it was great to see him speaking again. His mother, his wife, and his daughter all have cancer in varying forms, and the toll is understandably difficult. Last week was his first week speaking in a long time and it really lifted my spirits to see him rallying back.  In the afternoon, more going through boxes and repacking. I hope we have about 1/2 of what we moved last time by the time we are ready.  I’m sick of moving crap around that I really don’t need, but I’m just too lazy to go through or too weak to toss away even though i no longer need it. Now that we are moving into a house we will own and hopefully won’t be moving for quite some time, we decided it was time to get a bit ruthless with our packing and not move anything we don’t really want. A time-consuming process to be sure.

Sunday night I was kinda tired and since Yohan has to get up at 4am on Mondays, we headed to bed around 10pm. I took a sleeping pill to help me get to sleep. Usually if I take one, I only take one half. Last night for whatever reason I took a whole pill.

This morning (Monday) when I woke up I was basically incoherent. I was able to stay awake enough to call my work and tell them i was staying home sick, to call Yohan and let him know I was staying home, and that was it. Every time I woke up i was falling back into dream state while I was still awake! I couldn’t discern what I had done and what I had dreamt I’d done. I slept until 2pm in the afternoon, when I finally woke up feeling … alert. 10pm to 2pm! That’s one long-ass sleeping pill!! Then after I’d been up for a couple of hours playing my game, I felt a little drowsy and I went into my room to just “rest my body” for a few minutes. yeah, right. 2 hours later, I woke up again. Now, it’s 12:20am and I mercifully I actually feel semi-tired. I might make it to sleep tonight before say…. 3am.

Monday nights are my small group night and we got together as usual at 7pm until 9pm. Just as we were finishing up for the evening, we had just finished praying for our friends in the Rwanda mission, and the phone rang. Our small group leaders are married, and the husband is in Rwanda on this mission. He called just as we said Amen.  We got him on speaker phone and got to hear about some of the stuff they are doing and seeing, and it sounded (other than the sickness going around) so awesomely wonderful. 

I want to go someday. I want to meet the girls we sponsor. They have met many of the children that couples in our group sponsor and they report that the children are sooo happy to meet them, even if they are just emissaries for the sponsors bringing a picture or a letter to the child. We sponsor two girls there in Kigali and I just didn’t think to ask anyone on the mission to look for them. I feel bad about that. I hope they don’t think we don’t care, because we do. They are beautiful girls with big smiles and they are so happy to be able to go to school and to get a hot meal. It amazes me that we can change these girls lives by sending $29 a month. I can’t imagine $29 a month doing much of anything for anyone in America. Certainly not a months’ worth of hot meals, education, and clothing, and even a place to stay, for many of them are orphans from the Rwandan genocide. Not our girls, but many many of the other children are either orphans or have only one parent due to the genocide. Parents dead from the genocide or in prison from participating in the genocide. I’m very happy that our church works closely with a church there and has participated in building orphanages and a school and a chapel and is now working on building a center to do those things plus teach men and women skills with which they can earn a living.

Well, it’s now 12:35 and I’m going to see if I can get some sleep.